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I’m going to start tweeting some of the wild weird stuff I run across on AliExpress. I’ve never touched any of these things and do not endorse them.Permalink On twitter.com
♻️ 24 Retweets ❤️ 117 Favorites Mood -4 🙁
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A...car hookah?Permalink On twitter.com
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A...hot air dog dryer? aliexpress.com/item/32923219804.htmlPermalink On twitter.com
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A red-headed wig for your cat. aliexpress.com/item/32451232351.htmlPermalink On twitter.com
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A coatless rain coat. aliexpress.com/item/32893543353.htmlPermalink On twitter.com
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Toilet paper. Just $2 a roll. aliexpress.com/item/32803250245.htmlPermalink On twitter.com
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Another quarantine product. Wine bottle adaptor. aliexpress.com/item/32980445054.html?Permalink On twitter.com
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Perfect for socially distant outings to the park. aliexpress.com/item/4000097377859.htmlPermalink On twitter.com
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A...pigeon holder. aliexpress.com/item/32498338990.htmlPermalink On twitter.com
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Chicken helmets. aliexpress.com/item/4000193788680.html Disclosure: I just bought four of these for the four hens we're getting this season.Permalink On twitter.com
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Sequined Nicholas Cage face pillow. aliexpress.com/item/33059345819.htmlPermalink On twitter.com
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Nicholas Cage face swimsuit. aliexpress.com/item/33021198721.html I wonder how many more of these Face/Off tie-ins there are on AliexpressPermalink On twitter.com
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Nicholas Cage anti-face recognition hoodie. s.aliexpress.com/qAVRviiuPermalink On twitter.com
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Nicholas Cage action figure with cruise missile. s.aliexpress.com/JjMj2UZVPermalink On twitter.com
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I’m not even gonna link these. But let me tell you, hoo-boy. Aliexpress’s algorithm has now decided that I am a Nicolas Cage fan. The things I do for you people.Permalink On twitter.com
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A fascinating new design of toilet plunger. s.aliexpress.com/6JZb2uyuPermalink On twitter.com
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A five dollar slingshot with laser targetingPermalink On twitter.com
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I’ve never seen this design of “bow“ and arrow before.Permalink On twitter.com
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God damn it.Permalink On twitter.com
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One of my factories has an automatic shoe covering machine like this. It is, no lie, amazing. And, it can actually cover the shoes on my big American feet. s.aliexpress.com/3YJvquURPermalink On twitter.com
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“Buy your masks online,” they said. s.aliexpress.com/MnArQzaePermalink On twitter.com
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Smart....fingernail? s.aliexpress.com/zM7FjeM7Permalink On twitter.com
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And yet, somehow no hits for “Nicolas Cage mask“Permalink On twitter.com
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Why would you want your dog to look like Boris Johnson? s.aliexpress.com/eERnyeIbPermalink On twitter.com
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Parallel Pizza Slicer s.aliexpress.com/VzIN3I7ZPermalink On twitter.com
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Straight up snake oil.Permalink On twitter.com
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Literal snake oil. s.aliexpress.com/Av63qeMjPermalink On twitter.com
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If I can adjust it to 6 feet and wear it on a hat, I’m all in.Permalink On twitter.com
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Perfect for a frosty mug of Red Tick Beer. youtu.be/mtqbk9pgPXwPermalink On twitter.com
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Dog blow dryer holder.Permalink On twitter.com
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Hamster leashPermalink On twitter.com
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Guinea Pig cosplayPermalink On twitter.com
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Giant plush octopusPermalink On twitter.com
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Very sweatshirt. Much doge.Permalink On twitter.com
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Perfect for trick or treating. Or a visit to the corner store.Permalink On twitter.com
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Putin head on your real head.Permalink On twitter.com
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Fall fashion, 2020Permalink On twitter.com
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Probably not what the CDC had in mind.Permalink On twitter.com
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Nitinol wire paper clip. Especially for @oskay, I think.Permalink On twitter.com
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R2D2 french pressPermalink On twitter.com
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Coffee flair. Including an enamel aeropress pinPermalink On twitter.com
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Lace collarsPermalink On twitter.com
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This one is for @therealfitzPermalink On twitter.com
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This device takes 256 easily-replaced SIM cards. It has 8 EDGE modems. You can control it over USB. It’s designed to send SMS spam.Permalink On twitter.com
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“Virtual Kobe Bryant”Permalink On twitter.com
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Water-cooled...iPhone case‽‽‽Permalink On twitter.com
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The perfect cover for your fake AirPods’ case.Permalink On twitter.com
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Wrist-mount emergency flotation device.Permalink On twitter.com
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PS5-controller hookah mountPermalink On twitter.com
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Car Umbrella. With remote control.Permalink On twitter.com
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Saxophone cozy.Permalink On twitter.com
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Perfect for narco-warlord cosplay.Permalink On twitter.com
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Make every car a Popemobile.Permalink On twitter.com
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Car? What car?Permalink On twitter.com
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Finger knives. aliexpress.com/item/4001131550455.htmlOn twitter.com
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aliexpress.com/item/4001061081328.html $1 soda fountain.Permalink On twitter.com
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Dog Socks. aliexpress.com/item/1005001555375721.htmlPermalink On twitter.com
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aliexpress.com/item/1005001441327382.html It’s no wrist-phone.Permalink On twitter.com
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Smoke ‘‘em if you’ve got ‘emPermalink On twitter.com
